On the Road Pt. 3

02/02/2013 9:30PM

Given that I've written three blog entries in less than a twelve hour period, I suppose you can get a glimpse of how this vacation is going. It’s not that I’m not having fun, because I sincerely am enjoying myself and the company of Ogot’s family. I also got my cardio on in the pool so that’s a plus. I’m blogging not because I’m ungrateful for this trip but rather because there are so many things running through my mind at the same time that I need to get some of them out before I lose my sanity.

Ogot’s family is great. They are all wonderful people, very understanding, concerned and unbelievably hospital. I was never big on parental guidance before Mommy Lot (Ogot’s mom). She is always mindful of everyone in her family, super hardworking, accommodating and the epitome of a loving mother. Her concern for my well-being is heart-warming. I’ll forever be appreciative of how she treats me, which is almost like one of her own.

Ogot’s dad and siblings on the other hand, are also remarkable. They are always so nice to me that I've never felt out of place. Which is why despite all the worries I burden myself with, their company is always welcomed. From gadgets to jokes, from his younger brother’s plans for college to relationships, there are few topics that are off limits. Everyone is included and consulted in plans and no one is left out. Their family is not flawless but it’s so close to perfection that it’s enviable.

Now Ogot’s family may have triggered feelings of the things I missed out due to my unconventional upbringing (to say the least) but I’m happy with what I got. Which is why moving away is so important to me. We are planning to go to SG which is where my parents and sister are. The fresh start I want includes reconnecting with my family whom I rarely see. Because even though we talk over the phone, send messages via FB and text, it’s not enough. My relationship with my family is depreciated by distance and I want to amend that. I know I’m a little old to crave for such normalcy since I grew up with the eccentric way of living but that void is with me everywhere. The only reason I never left was because of my brother, and now that he’s no longer with me the void grew larger. Everywhere and everything here reminds me of the reason why I’ll never be whole again. That is why I've been obsessing about moving away and trying to get a new start. So I’m still praying, pining and pleading..

Please hear me.. I need help..